050310

My mother is dead

August 5, 1985

I grieve for my childhood

I am still 9 years old

20 years ago today

Tears

I want to get on the open road and run

I have nowhere to go

Ill visit her later

Flowers

How can I hurt my father the way he hurt me

I cant

He feels nothing

Void

How can I live

What has god done to me

Yes mother

God really does hate me

The world

You

Everyone

Hate

So why should I miss you

Because you are my mother

I love you

I miss you

You were tortuous to me

Evil

Caring when I was sick

Abusing when I was just being a child

But still

You could have taught me

Sew

Knit

Crochet

But I have learned one thing from you

How not to be a mother

I will give my child all the things you never gave me

Hugs

Kind words

Bed time stories

I will love my child

Unlike the way you loved me

And still

I miss you